Friday, October 29, 2010

Question and Answer Friday

This is your chance to email, facebook, or comment questions. I'll pick some parents to help me out with giving some different answers. And hopefully you readers will comment with some of your responses too!

First, a little bio on the Mamas featured: 

Chelsea--Mom to a handsome 1 year old with the most beautiful blue eyes ever--he also happens to be my nephew. 
Eileen--Mom to three gorgeous girls, 14, 11, and 9. 
Yours Truly--Mama to 2 cute little boys, almost 4 and almost 2, and author of this here blog :)
Anonymous--Mom to a 4 year old girl, a 3 year old boy, and one on the way, with a loving husband of 7 years.

1. How did you know you were ready for a baby? (Did you feel like you had everything in order? Was baby a surprise? Did you feel you were monetarily ready? etc)
     Chelsea--I had no idea I was ready for a baby even on the day Isak was born. I don't think anything can prepare you for the moment you become a parent. Although Isak was very much a surprise we had everything in order from finances to neatly folded baby clothes in the dresser months before his due date. Yet, I still didn't feel "ready" until the moment I held him on my chest. It was then that I knew I was ready.
     Eileen--I had trouble getting pregnant due to Polycystic Ovarian Disease. I was married for 8 years before I finally got pregnant, so Eric and I had plenty of time alone together and we were very ready for children. The Lord worked everything out; we were out of debt for several months before I got pregnant, which was both a surprise and a miracle!
     Yours Truly--Our first was a surprise. We knew it would happen sooner than we were planning, but weren't expecting it to be that soon. We didn't think we were anywhere near ready; my husband had gone back to school, we weren't financially sound, etc. But God works in wonderful ways. I am so, so thankful for our little surprise--it saved us months of wondering if this was our month. And the money? God has his ways of working that out too!
     Anonymous--We didn't plan our first three pregnancies but were thrilled nonetheless. My hubby never felt quite ready monetarily, but if we waited for him, we would be childless. My philosophy is to be prudent but also that we'd make it work-because you'd have to!

2. What was your greatest fear about parenthood? How is it now that you're actually a parent?
     Chelsea--My greatest fear was about how we would deal with the dramatic change in lifestyle. However, now that I’m a mom I couldn’t imagine doing anything else with my time. What used to seem important now pales in comparison.
     Eileen--I had no fear with my first one, but I remember wondering how I could love another child as much as my first when I got pregnant the second time. Turns out that was easy!
     Yours Truly--I was afraid of miscarrying our first. Other than that I didn't really have any fears with our first which was why I was so taken aback by the postpartum depression I experienced. Just like Eileen, with our second, I was concerned about not loving the second one as much as the first and also about how the new baby would affect my older son. Now that I have's amazing how your heart expands and you truly do have room to love each child equally! I even think there might be more room in there ;) older son is no worse for the wear. In fact, he has a built in best friend (with an occasional built in punching bag).
     Anonymous--Giving birth to a mentally handicapped or Down Syndrome child.

3. What were you most looking forward to about parenthood? How is it now that you're actually a parent?
     Chelsea--I couldn’t wait to hear Isak say 'momma' or to reach up with arms out to be picked up, and now that I get to experience it, it is so much better than I imagined.
     Eileen--I most looked forward to just being a mom - loving and nurturing a child.
     Yours Truly--What was I not looking forward to? I was looking forward to the first time I saw them, held them, breathed them, the first smile, giggle, true belly laugh, the first time they sat up, said Mama, reached up, the first attempt at rolling over, crawling, the first step, the first time they said I Love You Mommy, I looked forward to hugs, kisses, and all the learning they would experience. I looked forward to experiencing everything with them as they experienced it for the first time. And after knowing what to fully expect, I was that much more excited with our second. I LOVE being a Mommy.
     Anonymous--Family activities when my kids were old enough to talk and play; family meals full of conversation, family game nights, family picnics, baseball, etc. It's wonderful! Now, we just have to fight for quality time together and plan quality activities...or it won't happen!

4. What would you tell someone that is weighing the option of having a baby or not?
     Chelsea--I guess I would encourage anyone who has a stable home and is willing to give all his or her time and energy to a child to go for it. They bring more joy than anything else possibly could. We were definitely not planning on starting a family when we did, but God has a way of redirecting our plans for the better. There is much to consider when starting a family…how to pay for things, who will care for the child during the day…the list goes on, but in my experience and opinion love for your child will find a way to overcome the obstacles.
     Eileen--I think the marriage should be strong with as few stressors as possible. That said, I think if a person has the capacity to be nurturing and self-sacrificing then they should consider parenting. Counseling would definitely help (of course I would say that!).
     Yours Truly--See #3 above ;) Or see this. Being a parent is such a blessing, but I would be doing a disservice (and if you've read any other posts on this blog you'd know this already) if I didn't admit that parenting is hard. I wouldn't trade it for anything though.
     Anonymous--Please be married because it is sooo exhausting and hard to rear a child. I couldn't imagine not having a dedicated spouse to help share the load. My heart goes out to single mothers especially. But children are such a blessing! If you're going to have one; sacrifice so that you are the one rearing your child and not some other caretaker. Spend all the time you can cherishing your child because it goes quickly and then they are an adult and you want to be in their lives and have a good relationship to save so much heatache later.

Readers: Your turn to weight in. How would you answer those 4 questions?!

1 comment:

  1. I love reading these answers :) One of my greatest fears about having a baby? That I would have a hermaphrodite. I knew I would love my baby no matter what, but I worried how Pat would fit in at school, what bathroom Pat would use. Kids and their bullying, you know...