Transparent Moment--the 2 week wait

The two week wait. The agonizing, hope filled, nervous, what makes 2 weeks seem like years long time between when you ovulate and when you expect your period. The time when every twinge, every ill feeling, every slight difference to your normal day sends feelings of wonderment and hope rushing to your head. It's the longest 14 days/336 hours/20160 minutes/1209600 seconds EVER.

This period of time is different for those that are actively trying and those that are not; those not trying don't even know it exists unless they have an 'oops.' And yet, those that are trying know all about the different emotions the 2 weeks can bring. It's different for males and females; males may be very excited and hopeful but it's the females that analyze every possible early pregnancy sign their bodies might possibly, maybe, hopefully be doing. And it's different for those on their first two week wait of actively trying and for those on their 6th+ two week wait, and even more so for those on the 12th+ two week wait; for those on their first, it's a feeling of excitement and for every month that goes by those 2 weeks become torture, agony, longing, desire, and yet, somewhere in the back of their heads, hope is holding on that this might be the month.

The first few months of trying to conceive can be fun, exciting, hope filled. The two week wait is thrilling. But once you pass that third month mark questions begin to creep in to your mind. However, statistics have shown that it can take an average of 6 months to conceive so you're still able to push those questions aside. Come and go the 6th month, and the questions begin to force themselves a little closer to the front of your brain. But again, statistics have shown that 90% of women actively trying to conceive will get pregnant within their first year. So, again, you're able to push those questions aside...but not entirely. And definitely once the year mark passes the questions settle in. They take up permanent residence; "What's wrong with me? Are we doing something wrong? Will it ever happen?" Sex can easily become a chore instead of something fun, charting, temperature taking, planning, ovulation sticks, and countless pregnancy tests. And the two week wait... And even though you haven't miscarried, it can seem like a part of you dies every time your period begins. It can be easy to look at pregnant women with disdain. Or, hear stories of women like myself(here) with 2 beautiful boys and harbor feelings of resentment, anger, remorse.

I was very fortunate that our first was a 'surprise.' We thought we'd get pregnant sooner than we were planning on since I wasn't taking birth control (and other forms of protection aren't effective when they're in the drawer) so I didn't suffer the 2 week wait like many women. We were equally fortunate that we got pregnant with our second right away; I only had the first cycle of two week waits to sit impatiently through. Even though I don't have direct experience with painful two week waits, my heart breaks when I hear stories from my friends.

Readers: The two week wait means something different to everyone. What does it mean to you? Share YOUR transparent stories!!